a little “f” & A BIG “F”

There are friends with a little “f” and friends with a big “F”. The first is a large group with sloppy admission standards while the later is an elite, time-tested crew.

A little “f” friend: identifies themselves when they call.
A big “F” Friend: doesn’t have to.

A little “f” friend: opens a conversation with a full news bulletin on their life.
A big “F” friend: asks “What’s new with you?”

A little “f” friend: thinks the problems you whine about are recent.
A big “F” friend: says, “You’ve been whining about the same thing for 3 years. Get off your duff and do something about it.”

A little “f” friend: has never seen you cry.
A big “F” friend: has shoulders soggy from your tears.

A little “f” friend: doesn’t know your parent’s first names.
A big “F” friend: has your parent’s phone numbers in their address book.

A little “f” friend: knows almost nothing about your family.
A big “F” friend: knows the medical history, dietary habits and marital troubles of everyone on your tree.

A little “f” friend: brings a bottle of wine to your party.
A big “F” friend: comes early to help you cook and stays late to help you clean.

A little “f” friend: wonders about your romantic history.
A big “F” friend: could blackmail you with it.

A little “f” friend: when visiting, they act like a guest.
A big “F” friend: when visiting, they open your refrigerator, put their feet on the sofa, talks back to your spouse and reprimands your children.

A little “f” friend: thinks the friendship is over when you argue.
A big “F” friend: knows that a friendship is not a friendship until you’ve had a fight.

A big “F” friend forwarded this to me.