Be Your Own Person

April 27, 2008

People who say they cannot be their own person usually claim that someone else is keeping them from being themselves.

How can that be true? How can you be anyone but yourself?

When you are afraid to risk, you stop being your own person. Then you become the ward of anyone who will protect you.

Unfortunately, the person who protects you expects you to behave like the person he or she feels you should be, the person he or she rescued you to become.

If you are afraid of being your own person, you’re probably afraid of taking care of yourself or being own your own. If someone should accompany you, fine, but the purpose of choosing your own way is to keep company with your own best, not to rely on the strength of others.

Accept your independence and the loneliness that comes with it by being willing to go it alone, not in defiance, but as a choice.

If you are afraid of being your own person, you are probably afraid of your own anger. You feel you have to hold it in or else you might offend the person you depend on for your survival, or run the risk of being thrown out in the cold if you express yourself.

So you hold your anger inside, and after a time it turns inward. Then you hate yourself for being weak, inferior, not being your own person.

It is a vicious cycle.

You are never trapped if you are your own person.

You may make mistakes, but you are free to correct them.

You may hurt others, but you are able to apologize and deal with their rejection.

You may be hurt, but you feel strong enough to love again.

Save yourself.

Just do what is right for you.

Express yourself.

Find your life and live it.

If you cannot act in your own best interests, you cannot act in anyone else’s.


11 Responses to “Be Your Own Person”

  1. trinity Says:

    Yeah I try to be myself… in real life and in blogsphere… can you see myself? πŸ™‚ I think I am not good enough at wearing a mask.. 😦 I even upload my own pictures too many!! *doh* Now I a little bit regret as many bloggers don’t reveal their pictures and I really can’t see their face… *sobs*

    Your blog belongs to you, Trinity. It’s up to you to post whatever you like, i.e., your personal photos. πŸ˜‰

    Don’t worry about what the anonymous bloggers, including myself, look like. I assure you that we’re very human like you. πŸ˜›

  2. LB Says:

    It’s people who shine who can be themselves all the time. Some people… *grin* reflect that light, while some others absorb. So, shine the light!

    Thanks for your words of encouragement, LB. πŸ™‚

  3. mirror~me Says:

    finding urself is a multi-faceted phase…real or imagined, the way we speak, think, eat, walk etc are all influenced by wots ard us. what & who we are arent easily described… even by oneself. whatever is it, yes ‘be your own person’, dat person dat makes u happy…dat person who arent pliable…dat person who can stand on her own 2 feet…dat person dat makes u, whole!

    if that makes any sense πŸ™‚

    It does, Mirror~me. Thanks. πŸ™‚

  4. kat Says:

    Be myself? You wouldn’t believe the number of times I have had my foot in my mouth for being that!!

    Why is it the closer you are to someone, the less afraid you are to show the ugly side of yourself??

    I have so many masks to choose from every day – the good, the bad, the ugly. How many of us can truly claim we dare show our true selves to the world??

    Coz’ the person you’re close to knows the real you, Kat.

    Maybe not to the whole world.. but at least to people we know. Btw, I’ve only seen you in your good mask. πŸ˜‰

  5. andiesummerkiss Says:

    Be ourselves require a lot of sacrifices, I agree with you. We risk of not getting along with others, mostly.

    Sometimes I do find that life is so much easier when I just pretend to be as somebody people want me to be. Like a frog who can change the colour of the skin? That makes me a hypocrite, really. But it does save me from a lot of dramas. That’s my work life. It sucks.

    On my own time, I am myself. It’s nasty and not charming at times. But I love it.

    Be whatever that makes you happy, Andie.. ‘coz that is of utmost importance. πŸ˜‰

    Thanks for sharing. πŸ™‚

  6. ianliew Says:

    Just to update you, I’m feeling better now. Focusing on things I need to do that have been left aside for a while. Thank you for your encouragement and support, sis.

    I’m very happy to hear that & you do know that you’re welcome to contact me anytime, bro. πŸ™‚

  7. mistipurple Says:

    wonderful post, as usual jem!
    you’ve got class you know? πŸ™‚

    Thanks, Misti. I’m glad you like it. πŸ™‚
    I know.. πŸ˜›

  8. trinity Says:

    I am here again.. πŸ™‚ waiting for your email for tribute to dads.. *grin* no lah.. I am here, to say thank you very much for having fun with me and others yesterday.. I appreciate it, dear Jemima!

    The pleasure is mine, Trinity. I really had a good time. πŸ˜€

  9. I’m allergic to bees. So I can neither Bee myself nor let anyone else Bee Me, cause it’s not nice to bee someone.
    Of course I can’t let anyone else define me either, cause then I might bee someone else and as I already said, beeing someone isn’t nice.
    So, lets all stop beeing people. Leave the bees alone to make honey! πŸ™‚

    Ditto, Dabeedo. πŸ˜†

  10. iamikel Says:

    Jem, you got what class? how come i don’t know wan? hehe

    *kaypo kaypo*

    be yourself. if people accept you the way you are, meaning they are your friends. they love you anyhow..

    wooooooohooooooo.. another great post!

    Iamikel, it doesn’t matter if anyone thinks I got class or none at all. I am only my own person.. & that’s good enough. πŸ˜‰

    Thanks for the compliments, my friend. πŸ™‚

  11. Kyels Says:

    There are times when people choose to be others b/c they think it is cool to copycat and even imitate what others are doing but actually remaining as yourself is the best option. Pointless to masquerade around if you’re trying to live in someone else’s shoes.

    That’s right, Kyels.

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