jk_grinchxmas

Dr. Seuss said it well: Christmas is more than what we buy at a store.

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Pay Your Own Way

November 25, 2008

jk_shop

Pay your own way. You won’t owe anyone anything. Anything!

You won’t be compromised by the fear of disappointing people. Other people’s expectations will simply be their expectations, not your obligation.

You can make your own decisions: where to go, what to do, where to stay, what to eat, when to leave, and when to remain home. You can say no without feeling guilty and yes without feeling selfish.

If you cannot afford the things you want to do without someone else’s paying for you, let it be a reminder of your limitations, an encouragement to expand.  Reality is creativity’s best inspiration.

If you want to do something that badly, you’ll do it. You’ll make a plan or figure out a way. You can do it if you really want to.

And if you can’t figure out a way to do what you want right now, then you have an even more valuable lesson to learn. Maybe you have to rethink how you live your life, what makes you happy, what you can and can’t afford. Maybe your work needs to be more fulfilling so you don’t feel you need to reward yourself for suffering at a boring job.

A happy life is scaled to your reality, not your fantasy.

A wealthy person can have anything he or she wants – but not everything.

A rich person needs nothing.

A poor person feels in debt to the entire world.

I need nothing from others but understanding.

I give what I need to myself.

Whoever loves me loves me.

Who does not does not.

Be Sincere

November 23, 2008

Insincerity is trying to get away with as much as you can.

Most insincerity is the result of trying to please others, especially when you’re afraid you won’t be liked if you speak the truth or say how you really feel.

Don’t pretend to care about something when you really don’t care at all. It just sets people up to expect what you have no intention of delivering. Remember your manners, but be straight-forward just the same.

People will dislike you more for misleading them than if you hurt them openly.

When people are aware you hurt them, they can protect themselves and limit the damage. When you deceive them, you lull them into a false sense of security and lower their guard. The damage you do is greater because it is tainted with your betrayal.

Say what you really mean. You may risk rejection if you do, but it’s better than hating yourself for using others.

When you are insincere, you become insensitive to others and unaware when you hurt or use them. Worse, you justify your actions by claiming that you’re only doing what others would do if they are in your position.

When you try to convince yourself that everyone is just as superficial as you, the loveliness of the world fades and nothing seems to matter or have meaning.

When others depend on your strength, it is your sincerity they are counting upon.

jk_bsin

I mean to make a difference.

I act in accordance with my intentions.

I have nothing to hide.

We all wish our friends well, but not that well.

Don’t be put off by this. You’re only human. You want your friends to succeed, but when they do and you are not sure of yourself, you fear being shown up.

When you feel down about yourself, it’s easier to tolerate hearing about a friend’s misfortunes than his or her successes.

Because your friends are closest to being like you, their success makes you question yourself.

“Why not me?” you ask. We all feel this way.

Nothing alienates people quite like success.

When people become successful, they discover a sad and unexpected truth: It is lonely at the top.

Your friends need to celebrate their success without feeling that they are intimidating you and to share their failures without your taking secret satisfaction from them.

Allow your friends to confide their success in you without becoming envious of it or asking to participate in it.

Just say, “No one deserved it more.”

You’ll probably be right.

You’ll certainly be a friend.

jk_realfriends

I am happy for my friends’ happiness.

Sharing their happiness is my happiness.

Related Read: Be a Friend

Hint

November 17, 2008

jk_snail

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